college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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