chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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