After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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