just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
