I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
