bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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