I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize
