I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Randomize
