so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
