How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Randomize