I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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