OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Randomize
