need another drink. this is the easiest way
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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