It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Randomize
