But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
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