he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
So much rum. So many feels.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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