We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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