New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
