Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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