It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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