anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
