spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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