Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
