You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize