I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
