mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
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