Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Randomize