wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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