Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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