Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
