your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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