Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
