then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
