i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Did I show you my penis last night?
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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