my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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