Moan for me like Helen Keller
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
