i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
