Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
