so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
