we're blogging at a bar
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
