you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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