her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
