the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
