Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
