is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
