so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize