So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize