If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
