He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
