I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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